Q: What does an old woman have between her breasts that a young woman doesn't?
A: A navel.

Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: "How do you breath through something so small?"

Q: Why don't women wear watches?
A: There's a clock on the stove!

Q: What doesn't belong in this list : Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?
A: Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs or wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.

Q: Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms?
A: They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.

Q: What's worse than getting raped by Jack the Ripper?
A: Getting fingered by Captain Hook.

Q: What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common?
A: They both like a tight seal.

Q: What's the difference between a wife and a wheelie bin?
A: You only have to take out a wheelie bin once a week.

Q: What did the two lesbian frogs say to each other?
A: WE DO TASTE LIKE CHICKEN!

Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?
A: Why are you shaking she's going to eat me.